Issues of race, culture, religion, chauvinism often pop up in clubs, and there is no easy way to tell where and when one might run into a problem. As for race speficially...I've known some non-Caucasian dancers who have done really well and never mentioned having any problems with club management...but I've also met a few who used to blame their own failures on supposed prejudices of everyone else around. The rare cases where I've openly seen race issues come up inside the club were with managers who - truly - hated all dancers equally, just everyone for different reasons (this was in Niagara Falls, with Serbian owners who came off as rather xenophobic on more than one occasion).
But I am not a dancer "of color", so I cannot really speak for them- I simply do not know whether race really is a big issue.

Most clubs I where I worked in Toronto area are, to the best of my knowledge, fine. If you are unsure, try the Brass Rail or Zanzibar- these are bigger downtown clubs with dancers of all backgrounds and a ton of clients who are in town on business (from abroad, thus a good cultural mix. Diverse clients like diverse dancers).

I think in most cases club owners put your ability to earn cash and attract clients before your race or cultural background. If you can help the club make money- you are in, regardless of what the owner's personal preferences may be...so if a club owner/manager happens to turn you away and you suspect that color may have something to do with it, keep in mind that this particular club (due to location and clientelle, think small dive in a white-washed industrial neighborhood for example) probably wouldn't make you money anyway.
Good luck!

Yes. Anyone can be a stripper. Sex work may not be smiled upon by some Christian denominations, but engaging in it does not make one a non-Christian.
I have met plenty of exotic dancers who are also regular church goers and who frequently volunteer at their church's soup kitchens and help out at fund raisers etc.

In the end, whether or not to become a stripper is and should be a personal decision. If you do not feel comfortable about stripping, have moral objections to the job, or can't deal with the possibility of being ostrasized by your church- then you should probaby consider other employment options.

In short, the answer is yes.
Seasoned strippers make money through regular clients, as well as rehearsed techniques and behaviours that have become almost second nature to them.
Newbie dancers haven't yet established any routines and aren't going through the motions. They are learning, and their work behaviour is very 'fresh' and authentic, which stands out and is extremely sexy to most men. Additionally, a newbie dancer is also a new face at the club, which by default makes regular patrons curious and willing to spend. (This is also why a lot of experienced dancers like to change clubs every so often- being a new dancer in a strip club will often be profitable until the novelty wears off.)

Hi Tia,
I'm not sure if the fees have gone up recently. You can call the Toronto Municipal Licensing Centre at 416-392-6700 and ask what the fee is to obtain a Burlesque Entertainer license.
As for clubs- "cleanliness" is always a bit of a grey area, esp. because, if anything, it's a quality of a dancer, rather than a club. I'd suggest you visit a handful of clubs in a capacity of a customer, just to look around and see if you find a place you like. I wrote about it here: http://museforallseasons.com/blog/2010/04/new-strippers-tips-on-picking-the-right-strip-club/

Hi, Tia.
I haven't worked in many clubs in Mississauga, so I don't have a good idea of what goes on there these days, but you might want to try Pure Gold - it's more of an open concept type club where private dance areas aren't very private, so lap dances are probably what you might call 'cleaner'.

Hi Michelle,

These are all hard questions that have no definite answers. In my experience, men that have a problem with stripping since the very beginning (which he does, as the "quit-stripping-or-no-marriage" ultimatum suggests), will always have it. It's a once a stripper- always a stripper thing that he is unlikely to get over. And even if stripper past doesn't get openly brought up in arguments, it's more than likely that it will be implied, or- worse- that this will be something that your man might use to justify fits of jealosy or anger etc.
Of course, I do not know your particular circumstances, but both with my Christian boy (who did, at one point also consider marriage) and much more so with my ex-husband, stripping (and in the latter case, just the idea of stripping, as I temporarily relocated from Toronto and didn't dance during most of my marriage) was definitely used to justify the fits of jealosy, lack of trust, ugly accusations, show of aggression and all kinds of mean things.

The main question that you should ask is what do you want from this relationship? If marriage, then what kind of a marriage? Do you think that quitting dancing will allow the two of you to have a fulfilling and loving relationship?

I'd try talking to him, and finding out what it is exactly about stripping that makes you "non-marrigeable", and whether he thinks that quitting would really solve all the issues, and how. What he says and doesn't say will probably give you more than enough clues as to what's going on inside his head, what kind of a future you might have with him, and how you should proceed from there.

Best of luck,

L.

Hi Maya,
I'm assuming you are looking for a club in Toronto? While all clubs prefer that you do a stage show, most will let you getaway without doing one if you pay a higher freelance fee. Jillys and Filmores will be ok with you not doing a show.
You can get away with not doing a show at the Brass Rail only if you work late, when they have enough dancers to cover all shows already.
Most often, stage show requirements will vary depending on the time of the day you work. If you are just starting out and feel uncomfortable about stage, trying talking to the manager or DJ and explain that you'd like to settle in first. In a good club, management should be understanding and this shouldn't be problem.

You might want to consider doing stage though- it's a great way to let your customers see you.

Hi Mel,
I don't think there is such a thing as the best club to work at, but there are definitely some clubs that are a better match for you than others. You can read my post on finding the right club here: http://museforallseasons.com/blog/2010/04/new-strippers-tips-on-picking-the-right-strip-club/

And you can learn about the paperwork needed to dance in Toronto here: http://museforallseasons.com/blog/2010/04/how-to-become-a-stripper-in-toronto/

Best of luck!
L.

Hi Isabel,

I actually never really worked at FYEO, but the situation you are describing isn't that uncommon. It's probably best to resolve the situation by simply telling the girls at the coat check (are they even entitled to refuse you entry??? On what grounds?) that you are there to see the manager, that you have an appointment, and you aren't leaving until you see him. Simple as that. Better yet- make sure you know the name of the manager you are there to see.
The girls are probably aftraid of the competition they see in you, which is why they are trying to turn you away. Otherwise, I don't see how, why, or by what authority they are refusing you entry.
Remember, managers are interested in seeing new talent. There is a shortage of good dancers, and some clubs even compete over them.
Luna

Hi Alexis,

I can't really give you a list of clubs that are 'safe' or 'good', because 1) clubs can change over time, and 2) 'good' is a matter of personal preference. Take a look at my post on picking the right club ( http://museforallseasons.com/blog/2010/04/new-strippers-tips-on-picking-the-right-strip-club/ ) for tips on how to find a good place to work. Good luck.

It's actually pretty simple: exfoliate and moisturize. Exfoliating takes the dead skin cells off and leaves your skin feeling very smooth to touch.
Personally, I use an exfoliating body wash a couple of times a week and always apply a moisturizer after showering. I actually prefer slightly scented body butter over moisturizing body creams- they feel very light on my skin and work very well.

First, you think long and hard about whether this is something you can handle.
Second, think about your stage name (in your city requires strippers to carry licences, you'll most likely need to register your stage name when you apply for the license.)
Third, decide where you want to dance, visit several clubs, talk to management and dancers to find the place you feel most comfortable with. Some clubs will audition you, some (ie. Toronto clubs) won't.
Forth, get your licence.
Fifth, get some basic work clothes. Don't go spending a lot of money on work clothes before you make any. You can probably get by with a single costume for a bit, or until you figure out 'your stripper style'.

Here are two posts I wrote about getting a Toronto license and picking a good strip club to dance at:

How to become a stripper in Toronto
Newbie Strippers: How to Pick the Right Club

Chloe,

I wasn't seeing anyone when I first started dancing, so I never had to face the problem that you are facing.
Telling new love interests that I was a dancer was fairly easy, because, obviously, a new or potential relationship doesn't have much emotional investment, so it's rather easy to have a 'take it or leave it' attitude. That being said, all of my lovers took the news well...at first, but with time, as they themselves figured out how they felt about it, their attitudes always changed. Sometimes, they became more understanding, but more often than not it was insecurity and jealosy that started to show and became an issue.

In your case, telling him sooner rather than later is the thing to do. If you tell him now- sure, he'll probably get upset, or- more likely- be shocked, but you may be able to reason your way through it, preserving the relationship, or at least buying yourself some time while tries to wrap his head around the existence of the new you. But if you wait, then you risk him finding out on his own (through finding an item of clothing, or noticing that your behaviour has changed etc). If he finds out that way, he'll feel betrayed, and rightfully so.
If he trusts you the way you say he does- then be honest and tell him.

Good luck,

Luna

Hi Steph,

I know many tall dancers, and I definitely don't think that 5' 10" is too tall for a dancer...plus, there are many men who really like tall women ;)
Wearing low heels will do just fine. Some of the tall strippers I worked with wear knee high boots (low heel) instead of regular heels-- this way they still bring attention to their legs without appearing too tall.
L.

If stripping is legal where you live, then yes, money earned from stripping is legal. However, because in most clubs (at least, in most Canadian clubs) you receive your earnings directly from your clients, and no third party keeps a record of how much money you make, it is your responsibility to hire an accountant in order to file your taxes.
The good news is that a lot of your work-related expenses (costumes, shoes, make-up, tanning, waxing, or even cab fare in some cases) can be written off.

Chris,
You need to figure out what the real issue is here. Is it simply the fact that other men see her naked and get lapdances? Are there trust issues, and you are worried that your fiancee may be going further than just dances? Or are you worried that she might meet someone "better" and leave you?

You should think about what it is exactly that's troubling you, then talk to her. It's ok to set boundaries and be clear with each other about what's ok and what's not ok, and what would be a dealbreaker.
One thing I found as dancer, though, is that it just isn't a good idea to give out my number to clients. Why would they bother to come out to the club and spend money in return for my time, if they can just dial or text and be able to get a hold of me anywhere, at any time?
Those customers who text all time never spend money- they waste time, because more often than not, their texts have nothing to do with making appointments.
Instead of giving potential repeat customers her phone number, it's better to just give her email address, so they can email to set a time to meet at the club. It's less intrusive, gives them less opportunity to try to flirt with her, and keeps her in control of when and how to respond (or whether to respond at all). Email is also better as it helps protect her privacy- it's far easier to track down someone's cell number (and learn their real name, address etc etc) than it is to track down a gmail address.
I can understand where you are coming from, constant texting from men for whom she's danced, could get too much fast. I'd try talking to her and explain that just as she wouldn't want you (her personal life) intruding into her work life (ie showing up at the club to check up on her), her work life shouldn't spill into personal life.
Good luck!

Kali,
There is no set of requirements that a woman must adhere to in order to become successful at stripping...that being said, 28 is young! I've worked with women in their 50ies (and they made good money!)

If you are happy about the way you look and if you feel comfortable in your own skin- then don't even think about implants. Consider them only if they are absolutely needed in order for you to feel confident about yourself. Trust me, confidence and personal charm will get you MUCH MUCH farther than a set of implants ever could!

No no no! Under no circumstances should you get involved with him, or anyone who offers you "protection" in return for percentage of your earnings!
Don't put yourself in danger.
Think about it- he's offering you protection from what? I assume that stripping is legal where you live, so what do you need him for? No one needs to take you around anywhere, nor do you really need anyone's help to get started. Go straight to the club you like, look around, talk to the managers...and go from there.
Why would you give someone half of your earnings for nothing? Think about it, what if you aren't making money, do you think he'd still go around "protecting" you? (protecting you from what??? himself?) No, he'd probably coerce you into making more, so he can get his 'rightful' cut.

Reputable clubs have trained bouncers who are paid to look after the dancers and ensure their safety while on the club premises. If you are worried about your safety, then you could hire a personal guard- trained, licensed security guard, who would not only cost you a lot less than the pimp, but would also actually defend you in the unlikely case that something should go wrong.

Brian,
I've reread your question a few times, and I'll confess I don't exactly understand what the problem is here...Why do you feel that she needs your support or help?
Or do you feel that she may need because she is a dancer?
Most dancers I know are independent and self-sufficient women who, really, want only two things from their men. Those things are love and acceptance for who they are.
If you respect this woman as a person, then you are already doing more than those who'd try to respect her *inspite* of her being a dancer, if you know what I mean.

But from from your question it appears that the fact that she is a dancer has changed your perception of her, and you are attempting to change/get over/hide/deny this fact by looking for ways to show your support. To compensate.

The best thing you can do for her is respect and accept her for who she is. That's all. But if her being a dancer really is a problem for you (be honest with yourself here!), then it's best to deal with it now, before the relationship progresses further.

Good luck,

Luna

You can get your licence here:
East York Civic Centre
850 Coxwell Avenue, 3rd floor
Toronto, ON M4C 5R1
Information line: 416-392-6700
Fax number: 416-392-3196
Business hours:
Monday – Friday
8:30 a.m. – 4:00 p.m.

Don't forget to bring 2 pieces of Government issued ID and your police clearance.